the paranoia is kicking in and im not even halfway through math

natluvscats688 1/28/2022 06:37 am 285

okay so my dad is in a good mood this morning, i have my fruit punch, i get to have gym today and do volleyball which I'm getting pretty good at, i enjoy working on my math project and I'm very interested in the life of Pythagoras now, we have a really fun test in social studies (CER on the 7 principles and bill of rights to prevent tyranny), im a little woozy but in a good way because well,,,, (tw: drvgs) yall went to high school but i go to school hlgh, i have my fruit punch, my substitute is so nice and even tho it was awkward at first because she didn't see the parenthesis by my name when doing attendance and said my deadname she's rlly cool, my favorite teacher is back (i love her in general but today i can go to homework center during lunch to avoid this girl i don't like and i have to have a pass, so i can ask her for one), im almost completely done with i-ready lessons for the year, i have an amazing partner whom i love and that loves me back, i get to take a test in Spanish today and im rlly good in Spanish (straight a's all year baby!), i have my favorite marker, my hands r going numb which is scary but again ik why and im okay w it, i learned a really cool trick in my architecture and design class yesterday and ive been doing it non-stop its so fun (i might make another thread about it and see if anyone wants me to make something for them w it), im meeting with a counsellor today to pick out my classes even tho i wont be here next year but it'll be transferred to the school im gonna be going to (well... not really i guess because that's where the paranoia is coming from), and even though i had the most horrendous nightmare last night, overall my day is going amazing.

but, (and if anyone wants to let me rant to them,,,, let me know because i kinda really need to because i don't wanna go into detail on this post) im getting super paranoid and scared and every bad emotion because of something i plan on doing in a few months could turn out rlly badly and even though its with the person i love and i have little doubt that its the best thing i could do for myself, i also feel like it could all fall apart and its scary

tldr: my life is going amazing rn but i cant help but worry about the thing im doing in a few months and i cant get it out of my head, so its hard to focus on the good

but how are you guys? im feeling good so if anyone needs to rant or needs advice or smth, im here for u! <33

when u realize you put the same thing twice but you don't change it- (i put fruit punch twice but i love it that much that I'm not gonna change it)