for people good with insults, I need help (not to insult a real person) /lh

GoldenSnailz_ 1/30/2023 06:52 am 277

So I play D&D and my character is a bard. I absolutely LOVE vicious mockery (which, if you don't know, is a spell in which people take damage when I insult them)

I need ideas for insults. PLEASE i'm BEGGING YOU if you have any fantasy themed (or just really good) insults, bestow them apon me.

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Mar 8, 2023 7:34 am

I ask to duel you in a battle of wits but it seems you are unarmed!

Mar 7, 2023 11:16 am

Here's some!

- I hope you step on (insert thing) you dumb####

-Hey, you? Wait not you, the other you. Your twin. That you don't have.


Mar 7, 2023 10:49 am

(These are mostly a bit rude, so know your audience.)

Oh, wow, I just saw your dad the other day. Great guy. Have you met him?

(Deadpan) Do you want to go to Best Buy with me?

Big fan of your mom. In fact, the whole group is. In fact, the whole tavern is!

Wait. Wait. I've seen you somewhere! Um, you may want to consider putting a little flower sticker over your tablet camera.

Mar 7, 2023 9:19 am

i once called some guy a nasty syphillis man

Mar 7, 2023 6:10 am

Did your mom drink while pregnant?

Mar 7, 2023 4:02 am

"thatz why u lowkey built like a-" then juzt zay the ost RANDOM ztuff

ex: thatz hy u lowkey built like an upzide down bald water bottle

Mar 7, 2023 1:18 am

"you look like the type of person who couldnt tie their shoes until they were 16" is my best bet lmao - algae

Mar 6, 2023 10:43 pm

(these are definetely not targeted at anyone at my school, nooo.. wacko)

"and where did you get your outfit? the lost and found?"

"your hair is so d-mn greasy you could work at a mcdonalds and get an extra paycheck"

"you know, self care is important so TAKE A D-MN SHOWER FOR ONCE"

"your ego isn't that big, [name]. (optional: and neither is your d--k)"

"hate to break it to you, but theres something in your teeth, my guy"

tbh jump

Jan 30, 2023 6:20 pm

are you a dragon? because you make every maiden scream and run.

Jan 30, 2023 5:13 pm

u look like you cant wash ur butt correctly