"Grooming" is when someone builds trust and an emotional relationship with a person (normally a minor or teenager) with the intent of later abusing them. It commonly happens on websites, social media, chat rooms, and messaging services.

Groomers are very skilled at what they do, and they can convince you that they're your best friend or that they're in a relationship with you. But as time goes by their behavior tends to escalate and become abusive.

Here are some tips on how to avoid being groomed:

  • Be suspicious when a stranger tries to be your friend online, even if they claim to share your interests. Conversations with groomers often start off innocent at first
  • Don’t exchange contact details (e.g. your name, phone number, address, social media) with strangers. It’s common for groomers to get you onto another platform to more easily manipulate you.
  • If a stranger tries to talk to you about personal or private topics, or anything which makes you even slightly uncomfortable, block and report them. Trust your instincts.
  • Remember that people can lie about their gender and age online very easily. They might say they’re the same gender or age as you, or “17, almost 18” but they could be lying. Even if they sent you a photo of themselves, that photo could be an old photo from when they WERE 17.Or it could be a photo of someone else.
  • Never agree to meet up with anyone who you met online

Here are some red flags which might indicate that someone is grooming you:

  • Sends you lots of compliments saying that you’re cute, beautiful, etc
  • Tries to pressure you into doing things you don’t want to do, like send photos
  • Complains when you don’t talk to them often enough
  • Asks you questions about what you’re wearing or tries to discuss inappropriate topics with you
  • Acts like you’re in a relationship with them, even after a very small amount of conversations
  • Has very little (or no) information on their social media profile. Predators prefer to be anonymous.

Please report any suspicious messages, comments, or people, either by using the site's report feature, or messaging Crumpet